Milestones and firsts

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All smiles during the first birthday celebrations

First birthday parties are a lot of fun. Oh the decorations, the cake all for a precious little one who really does not know what is going on.

I’ve gone to a lot of first birthday parties recently and I have been blessed to be so involved in some.

Sometimes, I must admit, I am a little jealous that I have not yet had the joy to celebrate a first birthday party for a child of our own.

My mother has wanted a grandchild since we were engaged (mom sex comes after marriage so thanks for coming out). I’m sure even before that as well. Now when ever she calls, one of the first questions is ‘Any News…?’ in that special tone of voice.

I thought we were doing what is ‘right’ Love, marriage, a home, somewhat established jobs, secure in who we are and who we are in Christ.

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Our baby kitten Fitzgerald, almost three years ago!

I remember shortly after we got married we got a kitten. He jumped on me three times that first night. I woke up and said I’m not ready for kids. My dear husband confirmed his suspicions; kitten = best birth control ever!

So here comes the easy part right? Time to have some fun 😉 😉 And next is baby time?

Well that was a year ago…

I will be honest, this last year has not been easy. I have seen loss first hand and that rocked my world to say the least.

For some reason I knew having a baby would not be an easy thing. Call it a gut feeling. I was diagnosed early with Polycystic ovary syndrome and the doctor re-assured me that one major hurdle with this would be conceiving children.

So we have tried, prayed, counted the cycle, tracked my temperature and my doctor has finally confirmed what I dreaded, he does not think I am ovulating. We have listened to friends and family: relax, don’t worry about it, have fun, it will come in “God’s Time,” and every other little trick and tip.

Nothing yet and therfore our first appointment at the fertility clinic is in less than two weeks. Then I am sure there will be a number of other first with tests that we both will have to undertake.

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11 By faith Abraham, even though he was past age–and Sarah herself was barren–was enabled to become a father because he considered him faithful who had made the promise. 12 And so from this one man, and he as good as dead, came descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as countless as the sand on the seashore.
Hebrews 11:11-12

It’s ironic that I have faithfully read this story to a number of my sunday school classes. Trying to explain to the faithful children that they had so many relatives it was like counting the stars, imagine that. Now, I don’t want that many children, just one or two or how many we are blessed with. But the story now takes on a new life.

It is a favourite verse that my dear Husband likes to bring up to me. Abraham and Sarah did not think they would have children and I am sure they had many more obstacles than us!

However, they had faith that God would provide and he did!

I know that God has a number of plans for me, plans that I cannot even fathom and I have to be faithful for them all to be full filled.

First thing is to pray for my milestones to come sooner than later and second maybe to work on my patience!

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. jules4him
    Aug 17, 2012 @ 16:44:56

    Tiff you guys are great, thanks for sharing some really hard “stuff” Praying for you and Jason as you step into this next process in your journey. Blessings girl! If you ever need to talk, call.

    Reply

  2. Pure Ness (@justpureness)
    Aug 20, 2012 @ 13:44:57

    Hey, Tiffany. It’s definitely a hard journey you’re on. After struggling through many losses while trying to carry a second child, we finally went through rounds of testing as well. Unfortunately, we came out without an answers and still no success, but you’re not alone on this journey. If you have questions about anything, I would be happy to try to answer them, and there is a fantastic community on Twitter who are going through/have been through this as well. They are amazing ladies and incredibly supportive. Let me know if you’d like to make some connections there.

    Reply

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